I Could Be the Walrus...

WATCH THIS FILM!

2006-02-22T04:32:00Z

I don't usually plug movies, but Dealing Dogs, a new HBO documentary, is a must-see for anyone who loves animals. I watched it tonight with my mouth hanging wide open the entire time, except for a few moments when I was bawling my eyes out for the animals involved.

It centers around the business of selling animals (dogs, mostly) to research facilities. There's a whole lot of smuggling, stealing of family pets, and horrible treatment of the pets involved. I haven't been this disgusted in a long time.

Please watch it. If you don't have HBO, try to rent it when it inevitably ends up on DVD. It's extremely hard to watch and at times gut-wrenching, but I think it's important for people to know that this is going on. What struck me most was the strength of the main undercover investigator, "Pete," who had to basically sit by and watch as his co-workers and employers tortured the animals at the kennel "Pete" was trying to bust. He had to watch the deaths of countless animals before gathering enough evidence to bring the criminals to justice. Such a compelling story.

I can't believe that in this country, our lawmakers get up in arms about "decency" and "family values" while things like this are going on. We prosecute drug dealers and kids who smoke pot to the fullest extent of the law, but when it comes to nailing those who participate in animal cruelty, there is nothing but red tape as far as the eye can see. I hope at some point we'll wake up and start thinking about what's really important, but for now all I can do is post the link above and hope that the word will spread just a little.

Edit: Here's the site for Last Chance for Animals, the organization responsible for the investigations in the documentary. Give them money. Thank you; that is all.

WHEEEEEEEEE

2006-02-06T05:24:03Z

OMG GAFF is superfun right now!

I'm just splashing around in the beautiful, semen-soaked hallways of Gabbery. Stirring the pot is almost as fun as sex, and I don't even have to worry about getting AIDS! Fuck yeah!

OUCH!

2005-12-20T01:03:16Z

Am I the only one who is thankful for Millyfan at this, our time of wanky need? I've been so bored over at GAFF lately.

Ah, I love me some fresh bullshit.

...Also, I continue to be unable to comprehend why people are so enraged at somebody online.

Cheers!

Meme ganked from Knorg

2005-12-16T01:36:31Z

Though they rarely caused mankind any serious harm,
these Japanese fox spirits known as kitsune
were well known for playing tricks on people
and could be a real nuisance. They possessed
the ability to transform into any creature,
though they would often retain their fox tail.
One could easily determine the age and level of
maturity of a kitsune by counting it's tails;
An immature, rambunctious kitsune would have
very few tails, while a wise and powerful one
would have as many as nine.

As a kitsune, you are clever, sensual, beautiful,
mysterious and effeminate (even if you are a
guy). You are also somewhat sneaky and like to
pull pranks on people, but otherwise you are
very pleasurable to be around.

Who is your inner Shapeshifter?
brought to you by Quizilla
</lj-cut

OMG

2005-12-09T06:21:48Z

GAFF IS DYING!!!11 GAH!

*repeat cycle*

(For the record, Trip's LJ post was v. intelligent, well-said, etc. etc. but the thoughtful critique falls on deaf ears most of the time.

I'm still boggling at the fact that this post was taken seriously. Don't even get me started on the post beginning that thread.)

Because life was just a little too dull without my usual GAFF bitching...

2005-11-30T03:38:35Z

PART THE FIRST:

Fifth post in and I am made a sacrifice to a man-eating plant. Despite the fact that I am not a man. And I bite back. And I am really excited right now because this means my obnoxious avatar has done its job. To think, I was considering a new sig/av combination! NOT ANYMORE, FUCKTARD!

PART THE SECOND:

You can't just write about ANYTHING YOU WANT. NOOOOO FAIR! Seriously, dudes and dudettes. Reach around your hindquarters, find that small knob of wood you've come to believe is the beginning of a prehensile tail, and PULL THE STICK OUT OF YOUR ASS. I am reminded of a line from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory:

"Snozberry? Who ever heard of a Snozberry?"

Listen up, Veruca. I can just see that puckered look on your face as I read your posts about why canon is fucking infallible and pristine and why would you want to stick your big dirty Cock of Imagination in her pretty little ass? WHY? WHY MUST EVERYONE RAPE CANON?

Get off the fucking computer chair and get yourself laid. I don't care if it's a guy, girl, dog, dildo or doorknob, but find SOME way to loosen up. I know I'm probably going against all that GAFF stands for here, but a girl can only read so many laments about the downfall of civilization as it relates to fanfiction on the intarwebs before she writes a non-con, S&M, torture fic about Jesus, the Easter Bunny, and Mrs. Claus getting pounded in the ass by Old Scratch himself . Grow up, you fucking crazies. I don't care about your dumb opinions on why Draco and Harry shouldn't be snogging. Let the poor kids have a little something! Besides, that shit is hot.

PART THE THIRD:

Ah, the good ol' "GAFFers Defending GAFF in the Most Impotent Way Possible" Saga. Because responding to a moron is definitely going to win you that argument. Many times over.

Tell me, folks, because I forgot: How is arguing on the internet like running in the Special Olympics? Whassat?

(And I make that reference knowing that I am insulting the mentally-handicapped by lumping them into the same category as people who fall for the same troll schtick over and over and over. And then make that same troll their king. But I'm not naming any names.)

PART THE LAST:

What the fuck? Kill them. Kill them all.

Yey crazy!

2005-07-20T04:56:00Z

GAFF is a splooge pit right now. I've gotta say that I'm probably not helping, but I'm not really sure what to do except join in and bitch. The trolls are everywhere, Spiletta may or may not be trolling herself, a bunch of the new members are being completely stupid (HCShannon, anyone?) and I find myself laughing not at most of the regs but at Guests who make bitchy comments about the forum.

And then there's Lord Voldemort, who just made me piss myself laughing with his latest post about the real locations of the 7 Horcruxes, one of which is a minivan. Not sure what to do except giggle and go with it. Life is short, the HP spooge tide is high, and I'm off work this week.

*dives back in*

WTF?

2005-07-19T21:26:04Z

Knorg deleted his journal...again.

Curiosity killed the cat.

2005-07-05T04:17:53Z

Okay, folks. I'm bored tonight and I'm avoiding bed for a little mass-scale speculation. Let's talk about The Site Guru. He slyly hinted in one SUXX0R thread that he reads the LJs, or at least that he knows we're wanking away off-site. (I'm not going to link the thread because I like making you dig through all the admin posts. Builds character! Besides, everybody should probably be reading them anyway.)

I have a theory that SG is nasty_bitch. Why, you ask? They're both largely silent and we know next to nothing about either of their personal lives. Not that I want to know about their personal lives, unless said information confirms my theory, which would make me on par with Ben Franklin or somebody in terms of TEH SMRT. It's all about me, folks.

Back to SG, though. I wonder, sometimes, which of us he hates/dislikes and which he thinks are funny. I wonder if he shakes his fists at people, knowing that those people cannot see his irritation. I wonder if he has to sit on his hands in order to keep from replying to trolls. Most of all, I wonder if he has any sock-puppets. I mean, the dude obviously has to remain impassive and neutral for the most part, which is a wise thing considering wankiness on his part would pretty much bring about the downfall of the forums. But, does he wank on other forums? Does he wank on GAFF when he knows we aren't looking?

Discuss.

GAFF entry...Cue the salivating wolves.

2005-06-29T03:24:29Z

Okay, first off: this thread. TortillaFactory posts a critique of Wimbledon. A few things set me off. First and foremost (which I would have said this in-thread but isn't everybody tired of this schtick yet?) is her mention of Kirsten Dunst's character as "ditzy slut." Now, I'm not going to argue too much about the ditzy part, but as you all know already, the slut thing makes my eyes bug out. 'Nuff said.

Second thing that irritated the hell out of me:

"I think it mainly offended me as an aspiring filmmaker, because it was so pointless. These people are wasting celluloid on this crap! They're tying up the big studios and using the lights and the cameras that should go to worthier films....!"

This statement struck me as being tongue-in-cheek with a bit of truth thrown in, at least in terms of what TortillaPerson thought of the film, and film in general. I was probably wanking away, but I can't stand pretentious "film" kids who think the sun rises and sets on fucking Orson Welles' ass. There are great films out there which are mass marketed and it is never about studios "wasting" money; they're trying to make a buck off something they know will work. Hollywood is first and foremost a business. And then this girl tells me she's "perfectly aware of the realities of the industry." WTF are you, 18 years old? Give me a call back when you've wandered out into the real world after obtaining your illustrious film degree, and be sure to jot down what you've learned that is of any use to you in having a film career. Seriously. You'll probably be able to fit the information on a fucking Post-It.

(Yeah, I'm a snot.)

THEN she says, "No need to snark," and "enjoy your opinion."

Yay for a good discussion. Look, lady, you asked us to tell you our opinions on whether it was GA. I may have gone a bit off-topic, but you started that particular tangent with your comparison to New Releases.

However...I was maybe going to respond and admit that I was being wanky, but then I saw this condescending bullshit (pot calling kettle, but COME ON) and I decided to hold my tongue. Still deciding whether to respond, although at this point the thread's almost dead anyway.

...

I have a theory: What if nasty_bitch is actually The Site Guru?

...

"And, BTW, I do think Miss Kitten should shut the fuck up."

I'm thinking of sigging that one, but I can't decide which of my other quotes to get rid of. Plus, I have a feeling whoever that person is, s/he has been responsible for some of the other good quotes. I don't want to give all the good sig space to one fan.

OH, what the fuck is this nonsense?

"I find Miss Kitten and most other veteran GAFFers intimidating because of a) my young age and b) my newbie status. I feel that I could learn to like Miss Kitten for her sincerity and boldness, but for now, I fear I will be nothing but the victim of her wit."

Am I like the new GAFF Fuhrer or something? (And did I just break Godwin's?) I realize I'm a raging bitch, but yous people be taking this bullshit too serious. Fo' real, B. Seems like there's a huge misconception that I actually care enough about my posts on GAFF to actively hate people who argue with me or cause a slight irritation in my asscrack. Lord, I've got loads of people in RL to hate with the burning fire of Satan's hemorrhoids--I don't need anybody else to focus on.

Get the hell over it.

KK!

2005-06-15T16:17:47Z

You know, if KK could actually control the undying rage he feels toward me and just not respond to my poking, I probably wouldn't antagonize him quite so much. The fact that he probably has smoke pouring from his ears right now because I said Brandon Routh is gay (OMG TEH GAY MAFIA DOES NOT EXIST IN HOLLYWOOD YOU LIAR!!!1) is so fucking amusing that I just may pee my pants. He sent me a PM that was possibly the best thing I've read in like two weeks. It's entitled "Since you decided to be your usual obnoxious self..." and it just goes on from there.

My favorite part is this:

"At least those of us who complain about these movies have some basis for it, especially given Hollywood's past behavior. What do you have, aside from your overbearing egomania?

I put up with enough Hollywood ass-kissing on other sites as it is. I don't need you and your grease monkeys spewing the same lines here."

GREASE MONKEYS!

EEEEEHEEEE!

*dies*

I'm totally Odie to his Garfield.